One of the frustrating things about life is when the people who are close to you aren’t supportive of your dreams. Before you get too mad at them though, let’s take a few minutes to explore why that happens.
Everyone has their own set of beliefs about the “right” way to do things. When people aren’t supportive of you what it really means is that you are operating outside of their accepted parameters. I have one particular friend, for instance, who has the mentality that you have to punch a clock to make a living. I’m entrepreneurial however and when I hit a slow period a couple of years ago that friend sang the ‘get a job’ chorus. Does that mean she didn’t care? Heck no! It was exactly because she does care that she kept telling me to get a regular job!
So what do you do when this happens? Write that person off? Resolve to not tell them what’s going on in your life? Argue about it and demand support?
I don’t know about you but those options feel kind of yucky to me. And furthermore, they won’t get you the support you need.
Instead, try to understand those less than supportive people and why they are raining on your parade. Depending on your relationship with them, have an honest conversation asking for their support despite your differing opinions. If they can support you (even in a limited way) that’s great….take it! If they can’t that’s ok too. Look for other areas of your life they can support you in and capitalize on those instead. And find support elsewhere for the things they can’t help with.
Going back to my friend, while she is 100% supportive in many ways there are a few areas where she just can’t be there for me. In those cases I simply find other people to fill the gaps. It takes the pressure off our friendship and allows us to be more fully present for the things we do share. The end result is a much better and authentic friendship…can’t beat that!
Ok your turn. Who in your life can you change your “support relationship” with? And how can it bring you even closer together?